I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
