Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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