You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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