Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Enjoy the penises
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
