I want to have your abortion
I can tuck mytits in my pants
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
