his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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