I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
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