she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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