A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
