batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
