Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
