Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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