he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
