Her vagina should come with caution tape.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
