my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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