After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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