Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize