i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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