Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
4 words: hood of his car
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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