i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
mondays should just be called national damage control day
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
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