He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
