Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
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