the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
