Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
