We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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