fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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