once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Randomize
