On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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