Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
