Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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