10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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