The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize