no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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