sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
