i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
