I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
