quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
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