Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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