im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
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