she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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