Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Randomize
