we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
True college students do jello shots in the library
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize