I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
