Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
