I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
