he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
