last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
