Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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