i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
