just tell him i said nine months
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
