i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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