with your own penis?
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I have tasted many bathrooms
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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